I am not an anal person well I am but I am not. I love ass play but my character is far more relax I go with the flow. But there are things that annoy me. Buses that do not run on time, people that are late for appointments, blogs that are not there and excuses that are lame.
It is most annoying tht a blog goes quiet just because they are on spring breakor have to buy a car. Most inconsiderate of them to interrupt my reading of them how dares they. LOL just a little fun shot at a friend who has complained in the past about blogs disappearing.
A quiet day ahead for me and I think for many others or at least changes in their routines. So much has changed, munches have gone by the wayside, long chats with a variety of people are absent. Every one now makes toys so no real need or should I say want to purchase there are some web sites with great quality items. Almost everyone writes stories or journals, there are so many sites and clubs out there that we no long have the need to go underground with hankie codes and wink, wink. Every one talks of safety and safe words. There are list upon list of do’s and don’ts and how to’s that if they were all printed we would loose all of the rainforests.
I think I am missing. yes the old days of seedy adventure and fear. Searching through ad upon ad looking for key words such ” very strong minded or you need to be able to follow instructions “. The walking into a club and not knowing what you would walk out with all the excitement that you felt like a kid again at Christmas. Private parties and doors that opened and closed so quickly that you thought your ass was chopped off. The looks from those disgusting people that you hope would talk to you. Having some one walk up to you and tell you they wanted and off you went for a night of play with a stranger trusting that they had as much to loose as your did if they went too far but so wrapped up in the moment that the allure was too strong to say know.
Yes I know totally unsafe, I know all the dangers that we skirted the times it could have gone either way and the bruises and marks to show that we were not in a gentle lifestyle. I think I do miss excitement of fear that was always present yep missing the old days and the excitement of entering the unknown throwing caution to wind for the change of fulfillment of desire. So time for a coffee I guess and hopefully I will be ravaged by a postal women or a meter reader or maybe ……
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Exercising
I have always been able to get up sports. Any type of competition actually I love to compete. However getting into shape by exercise rather then play myself into shape has always been a difficult for me. Any drudgery activity is like that for me. It is so easy when some one is cheering you on rather then the silence of a gym or a solitary work out.
The only motivating factor for me is when I am with a dominant. First of all is is set as a task and secondly they can make it so much more interesting eith when they are there or not. Th e idea of being in a body harness and having to go on the stationary bike for ten minutes can cause a lot of interesting sensation suck as the ropes pulling and pinching areas of the body. Having times set by yourself does not mean much if you do not make them however when you do not make them with a dominant involved usually means an unpleasant sensation of some form. These have always increased my ability to meet objectives when a dominant is around.
Perhaps they should open up a gym Dominants are us I am sure they could come up with all sorts of incentives toget into shape.Well guess I have wasted enought time got to get back to the exercising again oh what is that an email well guess I have to answer it might be importatnms it is in my junk mail folder but hey it could be imporatant couldn't it? Right!
The only motivating factor for me is when I am with a dominant. First of all is is set as a task and secondly they can make it so much more interesting eith when they are there or not. Th e idea of being in a body harness and having to go on the stationary bike for ten minutes can cause a lot of interesting sensation suck as the ropes pulling and pinching areas of the body. Having times set by yourself does not mean much if you do not make them however when you do not make them with a dominant involved usually means an unpleasant sensation of some form. These have always increased my ability to meet objectives when a dominant is around.
Perhaps they should open up a gym Dominants are us I am sure they could come up with all sorts of incentives toget into shape.Well guess I have wasted enought time got to get back to the exercising again oh what is that an email well guess I have to answer it might be importatnms it is in my junk mail folder but hey it could be imporatant couldn't it? Right!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Pet peeves
Did I hurt you? a question that irks me in a session.
First off if it is delivered with a wry smile and a little sadistic laugh it is great. How ever when it is a real questions it worries me. First off being spanked, whipped caned or tortured hurts. Just in case some one did not know that. SO it is a dumb question, I tolerate the pain to get the rush simple is it not. The questions also suggest that the person I am playing with either does not know me or is not reading me right.
Can you get up? well if I am not tied down I can just tell to get up if I cannot you will know soon enough. Is not the fun of bondage trying to get away . does not your ability show when you slave cannot. Actually the use of the word can in a question not delivered sarcastically is annoying and worry some slaves should be told not ask in my opinion. Of course if I am with a Dominants and they use the aforementioned irks well not my place to say anything is it!
First off if it is delivered with a wry smile and a little sadistic laugh it is great. How ever when it is a real questions it worries me. First off being spanked, whipped caned or tortured hurts. Just in case some one did not know that. SO it is a dumb question, I tolerate the pain to get the rush simple is it not. The questions also suggest that the person I am playing with either does not know me or is not reading me right.
Can you get up? well if I am not tied down I can just tell to get up if I cannot you will know soon enough. Is not the fun of bondage trying to get away . does not your ability show when you slave cannot. Actually the use of the word can in a question not delivered sarcastically is annoying and worry some slaves should be told not ask in my opinion. Of course if I am with a Dominants and they use the aforementioned irks well not my place to say anything is it!
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Dungeons are good for thinking
I have put myself into my mental form of a dungeon for quite some time now. I have thought and pondered on the idea of my definition of a slave what I have done in the past how I started where I am now.
Where I started was many years ago after watching an edition of Rifleman where mark was kidnapped and roughed up.(for those of you that do not remember he was the rifle mans son) I went to sleep and had wild dreams about the idea of kidnapping and what they could make me do. I transposed myself into the role of the victim. I was eight years old. From there any chance I got to be the looser and face the consequences I did. If it was a gauntlet run then I did I did not give in my list of limits nor tell every one I had a safe word.
When I first found and embrace the lifestyle it was in a very secretive club with few rules for slave. They were written on the wall as slaves knelt waiting to be used. Any one superior to you can use you in any fashion they wish to . No DM no safe words and no limits . Trust is all you had, all you needed because of the scrutiny you had to go through to get in.We knew of the rules the Superior ones had . Play as you wish slaves must be able to be used again in 48 hours. The last part was very clear that mean you might get bruised but not willfully harmed.
All was good NOW with the Internet and services which only request a valid email address those rules I started with are must like saying bind fold yourself and walk into traffic the drivers know they should stop. This fear might not be here if I were younger and uncommitted to family but I am.
I also like to fit in thought I am a bit outspoken at times so when someone asks what re your hard limits I give them a list that I think they want to hear to show how safe I am. I do this because they ask and give control over to me which I found to be harmful to relations for me in the lifestyle. I do not want love from this lifestyle I want to feel humiliation of defeat. I want to be treated as the 90 pound weakling being given a wedgie. Though I might be smart then those in control of me or more successful then them in academics I enjoy feeling helpless at their hands as they spit upon me and call me slave.
SO now I think it is time to get back out on the meat market with no limits but lots of conversation before I accept them to be my owners. No safe word but an assurance they are sane. So now I think it might be time to remove all the coverings from hiding what I am. the question now would be Do I shave off all the hair signifying that I am adult male bring me back to being less then the Men and women that might own me or wait for them to tell me what to do. If I knew how to attach a poll I would
Where I started was many years ago after watching an edition of Rifleman where mark was kidnapped and roughed up.(for those of you that do not remember he was the rifle mans son) I went to sleep and had wild dreams about the idea of kidnapping and what they could make me do. I transposed myself into the role of the victim. I was eight years old. From there any chance I got to be the looser and face the consequences I did. If it was a gauntlet run then I did I did not give in my list of limits nor tell every one I had a safe word.
When I first found and embrace the lifestyle it was in a very secretive club with few rules for slave. They were written on the wall as slaves knelt waiting to be used. Any one superior to you can use you in any fashion they wish to . No DM no safe words and no limits . Trust is all you had, all you needed because of the scrutiny you had to go through to get in.We knew of the rules the Superior ones had . Play as you wish slaves must be able to be used again in 48 hours. The last part was very clear that mean you might get bruised but not willfully harmed.
All was good NOW with the Internet and services which only request a valid email address those rules I started with are must like saying bind fold yourself and walk into traffic the drivers know they should stop. This fear might not be here if I were younger and uncommitted to family but I am.
I also like to fit in thought I am a bit outspoken at times so when someone asks what re your hard limits I give them a list that I think they want to hear to show how safe I am. I do this because they ask and give control over to me which I found to be harmful to relations for me in the lifestyle. I do not want love from this lifestyle I want to feel humiliation of defeat. I want to be treated as the 90 pound weakling being given a wedgie. Though I might be smart then those in control of me or more successful then them in academics I enjoy feeling helpless at their hands as they spit upon me and call me slave.
SO now I think it is time to get back out on the meat market with no limits but lots of conversation before I accept them to be my owners. No safe word but an assurance they are sane. So now I think it might be time to remove all the coverings from hiding what I am. the question now would be Do I shave off all the hair signifying that I am adult male bring me back to being less then the Men and women that might own me or wait for them to tell me what to do. If I knew how to attach a poll I would
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Dommes can make sense.
After reading a few post and an exchange of emails I have found a Dominant that has the same concept of what a slave should be. The term has been confused with being s submissive. While both submit they are two different beings. I first stumble upon her frankly because of her eyes and when I read a post of hers about safe words. I cannot see a slave using a safe word yes for a submissive. A slave should be able to offer themselves fully to their owner not just the things they desire to happen. She has the belief the slave is there for her pleasure not theirs. I am quite sure that if we talked to a galley slave from old they did not shout red when the rowing became too much for them.
It was nice to read some one willing to take the responsibility for their slave and not push it off onto the slave shoulders to do so. Many time slaves are in no position to do this when they are in pain they might just be enjoying themselves too much to care. A dominant that does not require thought by a slave, nor inform them of what service they would provide but instead inform them that there is no saying (no, I can’t I do not want to) or any other negative statement to her request. What a pure pleasure it must be, to serve some one so in control of their desires.
I also realize that so many times I have sought this type of dominance yet never found it. I gave into those questions that first came out of Dominants mouths. What are your limits is one. Almost begging you to inform them what limits they must live by. Except for any one not legal to make decisions I had none when I started. Now depending on how dominant or experienced they are makes my list of hard limits an appropriate length. I unfortunately have brought my level of slavery down to a deplorable low. Another question would be what don’t you like well as the slave why should the dominants care what I like? Only one dominant couple ever told me tough to be you , suck it up and do it. But I had dumped on them a list of hard limits that at best gave them headaches just trying to keep up to it. Why did I do it because they let me consider ever fear possible instead of forcing me to trust them by saying no? Funny, how a word so small, is so important to the raising of children and the training of slaves.
I have always said I do not submit or give my submission to any one they must take it. How to do this? The strength of word, character and conviction that you can convey. The use of the word no. To do this you must know what you desire and have the confidence to carry it out with out the fear of disappointing the slave.
Now, I do apologize to those dominants that I have put down in the past or said they were lazy or not strong enough they might have just been living out their desires I could have said no thank you to them hoping to transform them into the evil dominant I seek but if that is not their desire I do not have a right to change them.
If I were such a perfect slave I would have never had safe words or hard limits. While I have gotten rid of my limits and safe word I do have limitations base on family and friends that any dominant worth their salt can see so if I can trust some one to tie me up I should be able to trust them to make decisions about things that were hard limits, if I can’t well once you are tied to a cross do you really have much say in the matter!
It was nice to read some one willing to take the responsibility for their slave and not push it off onto the slave shoulders to do so. Many time slaves are in no position to do this when they are in pain they might just be enjoying themselves too much to care. A dominant that does not require thought by a slave, nor inform them of what service they would provide but instead inform them that there is no saying (no, I can’t I do not want to) or any other negative statement to her request. What a pure pleasure it must be, to serve some one so in control of their desires.
I also realize that so many times I have sought this type of dominance yet never found it. I gave into those questions that first came out of Dominants mouths. What are your limits is one. Almost begging you to inform them what limits they must live by. Except for any one not legal to make decisions I had none when I started. Now depending on how dominant or experienced they are makes my list of hard limits an appropriate length. I unfortunately have brought my level of slavery down to a deplorable low. Another question would be what don’t you like well as the slave why should the dominants care what I like? Only one dominant couple ever told me tough to be you , suck it up and do it. But I had dumped on them a list of hard limits that at best gave them headaches just trying to keep up to it. Why did I do it because they let me consider ever fear possible instead of forcing me to trust them by saying no? Funny, how a word so small, is so important to the raising of children and the training of slaves.
I have always said I do not submit or give my submission to any one they must take it. How to do this? The strength of word, character and conviction that you can convey. The use of the word no. To do this you must know what you desire and have the confidence to carry it out with out the fear of disappointing the slave.
Now, I do apologize to those dominants that I have put down in the past or said they were lazy or not strong enough they might have just been living out their desires I could have said no thank you to them hoping to transform them into the evil dominant I seek but if that is not their desire I do not have a right to change them.
If I were such a perfect slave I would have never had safe words or hard limits. While I have gotten rid of my limits and safe word I do have limitations base on family and friends that any dominant worth their salt can see so if I can trust some one to tie me up I should be able to trust them to make decisions about things that were hard limits, if I can’t well once you are tied to a cross do you really have much say in the matter!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
How can you know
A statement that sends chills down my spine for the wrong reasons. A few Dominants have said to me trying to be all knowing that they know exactly how to dominate me. I have post many different ways of doing so on my blogs and journals yet they seem to miss the point. Yes I like certain things and ways of doing them every one has their personal tastes in these matters. The emphasis I always try to put is on the evil mind and control part.
Evil mind usually means some one who can think past the idea that they have to be in control and that does not mean getting every idea from the slave. The term slave I always use to try and show that I am the captive the one that is told what to do. I do not know of a term that reflects what I desire more then slave if thee is one some one please let me know. There are tons of books and blogs out there giving enough ideas to last a life time even that would be preferably to having to provide the step by step plan.
SO I have come to the conclusion that I am a source for ideas for fantasies and the odd photo. SO I sit mystified at the idea of a slave being offered and the Dominant not knowing what they want in a slave. Why do they even indulge in the idea without knowing what they want ?
Evil mind usually means some one who can think past the idea that they have to be in control and that does not mean getting every idea from the slave. The term slave I always use to try and show that I am the captive the one that is told what to do. I do not know of a term that reflects what I desire more then slave if thee is one some one please let me know. There are tons of books and blogs out there giving enough ideas to last a life time even that would be preferably to having to provide the step by step plan.
SO I have come to the conclusion that I am a source for ideas for fantasies and the odd photo. SO I sit mystified at the idea of a slave being offered and the Dominant not knowing what they want in a slave. Why do they even indulge in the idea without knowing what they want ?
Monday, February 23, 2009
Radio bdsm
a rock radio station has a contest on to win a trip. A challenge is given out to win. So far these have been cleaning a both in a peep show, doing a strip tease for a female announcer on air, cleaning the offices in the radio station in a french maid outfit and receiving 97 towel whacks on as they say the arse. Of course this is a contest for men so it is interesting taht there is such overtones of the lifestyle.
What could come next My mind does wonder hmmm perhaps I will get tied to a lamppost with a paddle hanging beside a sign saying go ahead remove your frustrations.
What could come next My mind does wonder hmmm perhaps I will get tied to a lamppost with a paddle hanging beside a sign saying go ahead remove your frustrations.
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